Choosing Belief during Difficult Situations

I do believe in God's sovereignty.

It's just that some days it's harder to believe than others.

Last night a friend's baby girl unexpectedly passed away. She was 2 weeks younger than Hannah. Almost 10 months old.

Tonight a dear friend's baby girl is in a children's hospital having difficulty breathing. She is 3 weeks old.

Sometimes I wonder why.

Why them and not me?

Why them at all?

A year ago I would have really felt sad for these friends. But today I feel a deep heartache.

Being a parent myself now, I can't imagine what they are going through.

The one thing that continues to go through my mind today is that our children belong ultimately to God. They are His children and He has given us the privilege of raising them until He wants them back with Him in heaven.

Job 1:21 says, "The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised."

But really, God? So soon?

The song based from this verse echoes my heart more clearly: "Blessed be the name of the Lord, blessed be the name....You give and take away, My heart will chose to say, blessed be Your Holy Name."

The only way that I can fully understand that all I have, including my children, is God's to give and take away, is by choosing it in my heart. It will never come completely naturally.

I know He has a plan. But that plan is not always easy or even ever known by us this side of heaven.

Praying for my dear friends tonight and their difficult situations.

Trusting God is in control.